Sunday, August 23, 2015

One Year, Three Months...

Dearest Jude,

This month has seen us saying goodbye to your Tete, yet again. She left on Friday, August 14th, around noonish. You and Baba saw her off at the airport. She cried as she was saying goodbye to you, I was told. She cried a few times after she got home to Jiddo in Kuwait, as she missed you so much. You are not easy to part with, because you get very upset when someone whom you are used to seeing on a daily basis tries to part with you. And you are so good, sweet, funny and kind, that it makes the act unbareable.

I don't know how much you remember from this age, but I hope that this year will be a foggy one in your mind. This was not my best year, as you could tell. I feel very guilty about how bad my mood has been, how it affects the people I hold so dear, and whom give my life so much meaning.

You are walking up and down the hallways of the house. You get yourself off our bed with expertise now. The gate at the top of the stairs has to be locked at all times. We can tell that you are catching every little word or action you are witnessing from us, so both baba and I are trying to watch our language around you. You seem to be studying words and things a lot more closely, and then when you decide that you have perfected them, they make an appearance. An example would be "meowing". When we are trying to reach you about animals, we are teaching you the sounds they make. And one day, you decided that in your head you have perfected the "meow" and let out the cutest meow I have ever heard. And you know that mama loves her kitties very much, so this was amazing to me.

At your last doctor's appointment, you weighed 22 pounds and 5 oz. You were 85 cm long. So we got the O.K. from Dr. White for you to be forward-facing in your carseat. You seem to be really enjoying the views and keep looking ahead to see where we are going.

Oh my how you make me happy. You truly bring joy to my heart. Not only me, everyone who meets you. Mashallah mashallah mashallah you are a blessing.

Please, don't forget Allah in all the you do. Without Him, your life will literally be nothing. Without His blessings, we would not have had you and all the other blessings we have. Not only do we have a roof over our heads, living siblings and parents to look after us and help us out, food to fill our bellies, clean water to drink, a peaceful land that lets us live our lives the way we choose to live them. Do not take all of those blessings for granted. Even if, God forbid, when you read those words, some of those blessings are not in your life, even if there is negativity, thank God for it. Because you would not know your blessings unless you have had negatives. You would not have the light of the sun without the darkess that had fallen before it. Never forget Allah, He loves you and us so very much. Pray as much as you can, help out those who need help. Do good and then throw it into the ocean, don't expect a "thank you" from anyone for it, because deep down I hope that you are doing good deeds for Allah's sake. Follow all the five pillars as much as you can. Use them as a guide to your life. The Prophets Peace Be Upon Them all, were sent to us as an example to follow, so do that.

I love you so much my dearest boy. Even if I may have a hard time showing it, please know that I will always love you.

Mama




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