Two Years, Three Months, Four Days...

Dearest Jude,

This month has been interesting. You met my auntie Nouha, whom I haven't seen in years. I love her and alhamdellah that you loved her too. She brought you a puzzle with alphabet and numerical trains that you love. That, and a dolphin which is in your bed. You gave it lots of kisses when you first saw it.

Tete left a week ago today. You keep asking about her. I think you really miss her.  I know we all do. I just really really miss her and my dad more than you will ever know, I hope. I don't want you to ever feel that way. I know I can't protect you from everything, but I hope and pray to Allah that you will never feel lonely even if you are alone. I hope you never feel sad. I hope you never get depressed. I hope you always feel heard.  I hope you always feel loved and appreciated. I also hope and pray that you avoid all the negative emotions and are filled with positivity and light because of being full of love for Allah. Without Him, we would not have had you, we would not have made it through so many things.  Without him your tete and jiddo's hard work and sacrifice would have not happened. They are the most incredible parents and human beings anyone would be lucky to have in their lives. Cherish them and never take them for granted. Cherish your family and stand by them. They are you and you are them. Stand up for them when right, and with kindness and gentleness and with prayer and guidance from Allah, stand up to them if they are wrong. Never lose your faith no matter how hard the world tries to make you. At the end of the day you and God have a connection that no one can take from you. At the end of the day it is your faith, life and akhira. It is no one else's. It is your fate. So no matter how hard it may be to practice your faith, with people like Trump and laws like the "burkini" law, do not give up who you are.

I love you with all my heart my darling. I may not always get it right,  but I will always try inshallah. Just like I know you will always try to be a good Muslim. I know you will always use what Allah gave you to better yourself and the world around you.

Mama