Eleven Months...

Dearest Jude,

You are ELEVEN MONTHS OLD!  I can not believe that you came into this world this many months ago. It almost makes me sad how fast those eleven months have gone. Don't get me wrong, I love every minute we spend together, but it just seems to have gone by like a blink of an eye. Please utilize your time wisely, it is very short. We don't get a lot of time, even if it might seem like we do. We all look back and wonder where the time has gone and if we have enough to show for it. Our time on this earth is so short, that we would need to be smart with what we do with ourselves. This does not necessarily mean that you have to spend every minute productively. It simply means that it is best to follow this simple rule, told to me by my dad, your jiddo: When it is time for study or work, work hard and focus on work. When it is time to have fun, have fun, and just focus on that. Give each thing you do your all, and I hope that when you look back at how you spent your time, you will have no regrets.

You had a hard month. We moved from our apartment in Lower Sackville, to your tete and jiddo's house, in Halifax. This move has been difficult, because it feels like it is dragging on forever. We have been gradually moving things over the month of April, which explains this feeling of slow progression. We share the house with your khalo Mohammed and your tete and jiddo when they are in town. We are hoping that this would be our first and last move since you came along. The great thing about this move, is that it works well for everyone. You have your own room, that you can grow into. I always found this house to be too big and lonely, even though it really isn't, but a house should not be empty. It just doesn't seem right. So with all of us being here, this house finally feels, to me at least, like a home.

You are a crawling machine! You can get over ledges and keep on going for a while. You also want to climb on everything, and are trying to stand up by yourself. We have to put baby gates up everywhere, just to make sure you don't get yourself in any trouble. You are helping us unpack by pulling everything out of boxes, which is kind of nice because it keeps us motivated. You are getting picky with food, everything needs to have plain yogurt in it for you to eat it. That is alright though, yogurt is full of protein, so I am happy.

I still can not believe how blessed I am to have you in my life, how blessed we all are. We have our rough days, but just a look or a smile from you seems to make everything better. Not just for me, but for everyone around you. You are so loved, and we feel your immense love for us in return. I hope this love of ours is always growing and never ending.

I love you with all my heart, my darling little man,

your mama

Ten Months...

My Dearest One,

You are TEN months old! Mashallah, habeebi. You have gotten so big. You have outgrown most of your clothes, for one. Another major development is that you, all of a sudden, decided that you want to start crawling! The walker we got, is still being used quite a bit. But you are enjoying spending time on the carpet, surrounded by toys. You throw the toys around and chase after them. You are getting into everything even more now.

You also have scheduled playdates now. Every Tuesday, we have Auntie Nadra, Malak and Ahmad over. Every Thursday, we have Auntie Karen, TJ and Jason. This coming Wednesday, Alana, Alana's friend Ricki-Lee and her daughter Abby, are coming over for a playdate. We have a running joke, that you and Abby are special friends. You seem to enjoy playing with older kids though. I think you are more grown up than we realize. You certainly act like it sometimes. It is more apparent when Rachel is here. You love playing with her and spending time with her. She spent her March break week with us, and we had a great time. We were home bound because of a major storm. But we tried to have some fun with it. We got dressed in our winter gear and put you in the sled. We attempted to take you out for a walk, but we made it to the end of our parking spot, and had to turn around. We had four feet of snow!

You are getting very saucy, too. When you don't get your way, you shriek. You start screaming bloody murder, or you clench your fists and shake your face and arms. I probably should not be laughing when you do this, but sometimes I can't help it. It is just too cute. You are babbling like crazy. Baba is a constant. Mama is said sometimes. There are other syllables that you say every day, but you seem to come up with them on the spot. And it is funny because you come up with a lot of stuff, when I am sternly speaking to you. You seem to be arguing your case with me.

We are still trying to call Tete and Jiddo everyday. They LOVE you so very much. Also, your khalo still tries to come over every Sunday. He is absolutely enamoured by you. Everyone is. You are getting a big head, I am sure. You can be bad at times. Like I said you are getting into everything. We have to discipline you at times. I think you are learning. You have a suspicious look about you when you are doing something that you know is wrong. You certainly act guilty. It is very precious. I hope you keep your innocence for as long as possible.

The world has some bad, as can be seen on the news every day. But it has lots of good, too. Please be the good that this world needs more of. I am not asking you to be perfect. I am just asking that you try to be as good as you can be. Have God in your heart, and inshallah you will always be guided towards the right path. This advise is not perfected by any one, myself and your baba included. We are all trying to find our way in this life. No one is perfect, so no one is expecting you to be. Parents, however, want the best for their kids, simply because they love them so much. They don't want them to repeat the same mistakes they made, because they don't want them to feel anything negative. It is silly, I know. But it can not be helped, parents just love their kids that much. The saying "Do as I say, not as I do", is kind of applicable here. The advise we give you, is from experience. So, we had to have the mistakes we are telling you not to make.

I love you with all my heart. We all do. May Allah be with you always and forever. You have so much goodness in you, I can tell. I hope and pray that you follow through with it, and not let some people's ugliness, misguide it.

P.S. Those girls, your sisters, are beautiful inside and out and we are all very lucky to have them in our lives, as daughters and sisters. God bless all three of you and always guide you all

I love you with all my heart, my darling. Do not ever forget that. Everything your baba and I do, we do for you.

Love,
Mama

Nine Months...

Dearest One,

Mashallah, you are NINE months old! Where does the time go??!!
We had a busy month. You are trying to get SIX teeth out all at once. You visited with your great aunt, khalti Lina, my grandparents, your tete and your jiddo (first time meeting face-to-face) and your second cousins.

You are eating three solid meals. You get a bottle at night still. If we are home, you get breastfed. If baba is home with us, you get a bottle in the morning and another in the afternoon. You enjoy cuddling with baba and spending time with him, alhamdellah. You have lost some weight though, as your appetite  seems to have been affected by your teeth coming on. But, you are still growing like a weed, mashallah. Most of your clothes are too small now. Even stuff that are sized for 12 month Olds can be too small on you now, mashallah.
You don't seem interested in crawling at all. The minute your belly is touching the ground, you flip yourself over onto your back with ease mashallah. But, you like walking. All anyone has to do is to grab a hold of your arms and you are putting one foot in front of the other mashallah. While we were visiting the family in New Jersey, we picked up a walker. You weren't sure at first, and it looked like you might not be interested. But it didn't take long for you to get the hang of it and run after us all!

Mashallah, mashallah, mashallah! You are an amazing traveler! The plane rides over to NJ and back, did not seem to bother you. You made friends easily with fellow travelers and flight attendants. The only issue was always keeping you entertained. But, all in all, for a first time travelor at almost nine months old, is an accomplishment. Not to mention that your great grandparents,  my tete and jiddo, are huge fans of yours and love you to bits and pieces. The whole family was very happy to have you visiting with them and were enjoying your antics and words. You are more vocal now and try to copy as many sounds as you can hear. One thing that you have done since day one and is the cutest thing ever, is that you hold your right hand's three middle fingers straught and flick them up and down on things. It is charming and cute. Your jiddo, my baba, thinks it's the most beautiful  thing ever and was the only one to notice it outside of myself and your baba.
I am attaching a picture of our electronic ticket to NJ, as a momento for this month,  since it was your first time traveling on an airplane, the first time you met your jiddo face-to-face, the first time I was alone with you and we were away from baba for an extended period of time, the first time you met your great grandparents. It was a lot of firsts for us both and it was wonderful.  I just wish your baba was there too. Inshallah next time. Also, this month, all three of us prayed together! inshallah we continue to pray together and you keep on top of it for your own sake.

I am sorry for the long post. I love you with all my heart, my darling.  May Allah always keep you healthy,  safe and happy. May you always be guided to the right path, and may you always use Muhammad PBUH to guide your life and actions.

All my love,
Mama

Eight Months...

Dearest One,

You are eight months old, mashallah. I don't have a weight or height for you yet, but mashallah you are getting heavy to carry and your clothes are getting small on you. So alhamdellah, you are thriving.

You are eating three meals, a couple of bottles of formula, and as much boob as I can give you in the mornings and around nap times, every day. Mashallah.

You are very vocal. You are saying a lot of "Bababababaaaaa", "Aaaaaaaaaa", "Mmmmmmm", "Tthhhhhhh", "Ssssssss", "Ghggggggg" and tongue clicking. You laugh your cute little bum off whenever I sing the arabic alphabet to you, not really sure why. You think it's the funniest thing ever.

You do not like being on your belly, at all. You seem more interested in sitting up on your bum, or being helped to your feet. You have the concept of walking figured out, as you know to put one foot in front of the other when you are being helped to your feet, and not jumping up and down like you normally would do. No crawling yet, but that is ok. We know that you will do whatever you want to do at your own pace. You are one determined little guy, and once you have your sight set on something, there is no dissuading you from grabbing it or trying to get it.

To celebrate you turning 8 months old, baba, you and I, had a fish and chips dinner. You seemed more interested in throwing the food around, mind you, but that is ok. You are in your exersaucer now and are whining. I believe that you are looking to get some boob to get a nap.

We love you with everything that we are and everything that we have. Your baba is trying so hard to work as many hours as possible to make sure we are taken care of. He is also trying to spend as much time with you as possible, as he misses you greatly. I am trying to be as good of a mother as I know how.

You are really getting frustrated so I will leave off with this:

Don't worry, Be happy!

الله معك حبيبي

Mama xo

Seven Months...

Dearest Jude,

This month's entry is a few days late. I apologize. It is Christmas time :)
We do not celebrate it, however, your sister Rachel, grammie, auntie Lynne and cousins celebrate it.
On your "birthday", you and I took a trip to Wolfville to drive your sissy Rachel home. She had spent a couple of days with us. She came late in the night when baba came home from work. You woke up in the middle of the night and she got you out of your crib. She said that your were pleasantly surprised to see her. And I absolutely am certain that is true. You get so excited whenever she is around. Maybe it is because the age difference between the two of you is just enough for Rachel and you to appreciate one another and have fun together. And that you do. You are always playing around with one another and showing her new tricks. This time you were leaning against her while she had you in her lap, with your back to her face. She would move her legs back and forth, and you would try to bite her knee wherever it was supposed to be. It was the cutest thing mashallah.
I don't have an update on your length or weight. All I know is that I am having a hard time finding clothing in your dresser in the 6 month category that actually fits you. We needed to get you a couple of onsies and shirts and ended up buying sizes 9-12 months, mashallah.

I wanted to take the opportunity to explain  something about Christmas to you. I was privileged enough to be born to Muslim parents. Your tete and jiddo tried their best to teach your uncle and I the right way of doing things, of living. They exposed us to as much religion education as possible. My real education, however, came when I was at university. I learned a lot about my religion and beliefs, and was made aware of the difference between cultural and religious beliefs. Your dad was born Christian, and became Muslim before him and I got married. His family is still up to this point Christian.
With regards to Christmas, some Christians believe that Jesus Peace Be Upon Him, was born on December, 25th. However, that date was chosen, I believe to coincide with a pagan festival to try and attract as many pagans to Christianity as possible, when Christianity was still a new religion. You can make up your mind about this and research this yourself, if you would like. This brings me to an important point. As Muslims, we believe that there is only one God. The individuals who were given the message from God, are prophets and messengers from God. We have faith in God and his infinite power and wisdom. Faith dictates that what might seem as impossible, can actually be possible. The stories from the Quran of the prophets, to me, represent examples of how we should behave. Also, the stories of who we believe as the last prophet, Muhammed, Peace Be Upon Him, are also supposed to be an example of how we are striving to be in this world. The Quran, provides history, stories, education on this world, as well as rules for us to follow, among many other things. It is a blessing for us to have this Holy Book as it has not and never will be altered like many other Holy Books. The Sirah (سيرة) or the story of Muhammad PBUH, provides an interpretation of the Quran, as well as an example for us to strive to follow, from Muhammad PBUH's own life and practices. Again, this is just an interpretation of my own understanding. You can research what you hopefully would have grown up with.
For us to be Muslims, we must believe in one God, his prophets (including Moses and Jesus, without any one prophet being "extra special"),  the Holy Books, angels, heaven and hell, and the judgment day.
So, celebrating Christmas, to us, is idolizing a human being, which goes against our faith. Here's a Surah from the Quran. It is called "Al-Ikhlas" or the "sincerity". It is very important to really understand what this surah is saying.

This does not mean that we are better than anyone. This does not mean that they are wrong and we are right. We believe in one God. Some Christians believe in Jesus PBUH as the son of God.  To each their own is what I hope you will get out of all of this. I know I will be contradicting myself when I say this, but I must say it. I truly believe that we are on the right path. Not because that is how I was raised. But because to me islam is the right way of life. It is based on fairness, forgiveness, showing mercy to the living as well as the dead. Islam is truly peace, as the name suggests (اسلام). Whenever I am "away" from God, I feel alone. Not because of some manifestation, but because we as humans need faith in something. We have too many questions that just can not be answered. Science can only explain so much, before we run out of theories and possibilities. There is a higher power, and we are all trying to find it in our own ways. Also, we are sometimes too smart for our own good. These days, if you look back to the period of 2000 and 2014, you will see that Islam does not have the best reputation. Some individuals and groups, who are truly misguided, unfortunately have done many ugly things and used islam as an excuse for their actions. This is not isolated to Islam. If  you look back at history, a lot of heinous crimes were committed in the name of ideology and religion. So please don't base beliefs on the actions of human beings, as humans do not form the faith, but the teachings do. The religion just like God, I'd perfect, but humans are not and will never be. 

So, be strong little man, and stick to your beliefs and values. Be sure that you are on the right path at all times. Do not be too lenient or too strict. It is like climbing a hill. If you rush too far up the hill, you will fall off the other side. If you go too slow, you will fall down and end up at the starting point again. So be moderate my son. Do not follow blindly what one imam or minister says. Do your own research. Use your brain, and let youd hrart lead you to the right path inshallah. After all, that is what your heart is there for. Trust in God and inshallah you will have a wonderful life. There will be challenges, and that is ok. Good things and bad things come from God. There is a reason for all of it. Thank God for everything that comes your way. Thank Him for sickness, for health, for sadness, for happiness. They are all blessings in disguise, to show yourself and God, what you are capable of. Have passion for God and for your faith, because no matter what happens, that is all you will be left with. We don't meet our Maker with pockets full of money, or with certificates of good behavior from this person or that. All we have is our deeds to back us up. No matter what happens, God is the All Merciful, All Malefisent.

I apologize for the long post, the opportunity just presented itself. I love you with all my heart my darling. My heart aches for you because you are in pain now. You have your two bottom teeth, but we think that more teeth are coming up. So now you are sleeping in our bed with baba. We secretly love having you with us. We are fighting within ourselves between keeping you with us,  and for you to sleep in your crib. The former is winning now, because of your pain and suffering with your teeth, of course.

Happy seven months my darling. I hope you are happy with us. I also hope you know just how special you are and what a blessing you are to us. Alhamdellah for you.

Mama

Six Months....

Hey There Big Guy!

You are six months old, my darling! Half a year! I can not get over how quickly those six months passed.
You are a regular chatterbox mashallah. A lot of times it sounds like you are speaking to your baba and I. You are also vastly testing your voice box. You have a vast range of sounds and volumes. The least favourite of mine is the one that sounds like you have a hairball stuck in your throat. I took you to school with me a couple of times and people around me were wondering why I am leaving my handsome boy to choke on whatever it is he was choking on. You had your very first playdate just a couple of days ago, on the 21st. We visited with a lady we met at the Optometrist's office. She has Jason, who is your buddy and is 4 months older than you, and TJ who is 3 years old and is a strong-willed young man. You seemed to enjoy yourself.
You eat lots of fruits, vegetables and cereal, and your body behaves like a regular little man's would. You are also very eager to stand up on your own and are a little mad scientist in your exersaucer. You are REALLY enjoying the Jolly Jumper! The minute the little harness is on you, you are pushing with your legs and working your feet to jump. You wouldn't even be hanging yet and you would be trying to jump already. You could spend hours in that thing if we left you to it.
Unfortunately, you have celebrated your six-month birthday with a chest cold. You are congested and mama and baba are very worried. It was bound to happen, considering that you put everything in your mouth. But that is how your immune system develops so it is a part of your journey.
Your stats are pretty good. Your head circumference is 43cm, you weighed in at approximately 7.6kg and are 74cm long. We have the ok from your doctor for you to eat anything and everything, other than honey. So your baba and I are pretty excited about that.
Rachel came and spent your birthday weekend with us. She loves you so much and you love her too. You are so taken by her whenever she is around. We all love you and can not believe how lucky and blessed we are to have you in our lives. Mashallah, may Allah bless you, you are an amazing guy, little one.

I am going to try and keep those notes short, don't really know how successful that will be. But here goes! Your grammie, auntie, khalo, tete and jiddo love you very much. We are so blessed to have you. You are getting restless so I am going to end this now.

Love you with all my heart, little buddy.
Your mama

Five Months...

October 23rd, 2014


Dearest One,

Today, you are five months old. I can not even keep track of all the changes that have taken place since the last post, mashallah there have been so many. First of all, you are one curious individual! Any chance you get to be up and your feet and looking around, you take full advantage of it. Your dad and I were just saying today that when you are standing up, with our help, you are looking around with big brown eyes, trying to figure out what to get your hands on, when the opportunity presents itself. You want to put everything in your mouth. Which brings me to your beautiful wonderful hands. You are now able to control them more than before, alhamdellah. You can grab of things now and bring them to your mouth. Even your feet are being pulled as far up to your face as you can pull to get them in your mouth. Sophie the Giraffe is very useful now because you can actually hold her and rub her on your gums. Still no teeth, although it seems you are getting two on the top as well as the bottom. So, my poor son is dealing with four teeth coming in. You seem to be handling it relatively well though. Not sure if the amber necklace is actually working or if it is just the fact that you are an amazing boy. Either way, you are an amazing boy. You only whine and cry when something is wrong, alhamdellah a thousand times.

We started giving you rice cereal this month. You love it. We started with rice cereal once a day and now you are taking it twice a day. We have also been giving you vegetables and fruits at four day intervals. We started with green beans, wax beans, carrots, potatoes, squash, avocado, watermelon, bananas and mixed berries. So far, you are good with everything listed, and you seem to like them all. But the last few days your stomach has been upset, and so you have been getting rice cereal and no vegetables or fruits. We will start giving you everything listed but will keep you away from squash and avocado, as they didn't seem to agree with your tummy. You are still mama's bosom buddy and you get bottles too.

Mashallah you are long, although I don't have a length for you for this month, or a weight for that matter, as you haven't had a doctor's appointment this month. You are fitting into the 6-9 month onsies and outfits. The smaller sizes are tight on you. You are in size 3 Huggies diapers now, mashallah. You are sleeping well throughout the night, but do not seem to like naps during the daytime. The only way you nap is if you are cuddled with baba or myself, or by laying on my chest. You are spending more time in your crib, because you are long enough to hit your head and wake yourself up in the bassinet, mashallah. If you are not sleeping in the crib, you are in bed with us. You have been sleeping with us lately because you have not been feeling well. Your teeth seem to be bothering you a bit more than usual these days. You enjoy playing on your MonkeyMat and have even managed to rip one of the toys out. You also seem to enjoy your time in the highchair as well as the Jolly Jumper. You are like a mad scientist on the Jolly Jumper and are trying to touch everything all at once. We have been trying to give you belly time, but it seems to upset you more than anything, so admittedly, we have been slacking with that.

I will try to find a Mommy & Me group that we can join. You seem to get a bit nervous with other people these days, a lot more than when you were younger. So it would be nice to get you used to seeing and interacting with people more. We still video chat with Tete and Jiddo every day. Your khalo Mohammed can not get enough of you. He keeps saying how he loves you like you are his own son and that he doesn't need to have kids because he thinks of you as his. We don't know about that now do we?

You have met my Khalo Ghassan, Tete's younger brother. He has admitted that he is not very good with babies, and did not hold my cousins until they were older, as he was nervous about their fragility. But he seemed like a natural with you. Whenever we were around he had you with him and was carrying you and playing with you. He got you a bunch of presents, including a stuffed horse toy. I hope you still have it.

I love you with all my heart, buddy. You are my best friend. You are my miracle. Never forget how much your dad and I love you.

With all my heart, I am forever yours.
Mama